You are getting on my nerves and I have to tell the whole world!!!

So much for keeping fights to ourselves. Looks like I'm the only one keeping to that Rule. But this time round,I'm just gonna let it out to salvage myself.

Doesnt mean I'm acting like a dick to you is because I WANT to but it's because I NEED to. I don't want to be good to you cause I'm afraid you will take it the wrong way and feel like I'm giving hope to you again.

I really regret the day for getting back with you just because you cried in front of me. You didnt give us time to really recover from our mistakes. And each time when I'm trying to be honest with my feelings,I can't cause I know it'll just make you cry. So how am I to be truthful and honest to you? I have a weakness for people crying infront of me and you've used it against me.

I really had enough of you; your insecurities in the past,you thinking I'm the one who needs adjustment when it has always been you that needs to wake up from your fairytale and your ignorance in repeating the same old dumb mistakes. Eventhough I keep on telling and showing you that I appreciate everything that you have ever done for me,you somehow will make me feel like I'm not doing my best.

I've kept my mouth shut even when I know behind my back you've been tarnishing my reputation. But everything has it's limit and you've crossed the line. So that's why I'm telling the whole world who has only been seeing your side of the story.

Yes I admit I'm a jerk towards you because it's for the best
Yes I love sex,fame and money but which human doesnt?

And hey, Rule #49: Only the good feels guilty.

Day 15 in Aussie

Wow!! 2 weeks has gone past so fast and only a week to go till Im back home. The first thing im going to do is kiss......... my bike!!! I miss her so much. The terrain here is Aussie is ideal for her. The dust and the sand go hand in hand with her. LOL!

I am so looking foward to my off. Gonna work my ass off with Foursounds and earn loads of
"KAA-CHING".(Well hopefully there's work that is). There's so much to do but I don't know where to start and each time when the time comes I always forget.( I need to create a to-do-list).

Besides that...I still miss my band. We haven't been jamming nor performing. I miss making music and screaming my heart out,dancing and making a fool out of myself on stage and just laughing our ass from our lame jokes and actics.

Day 4 in Aussie

Brrrr....Is how I would reply you here at night. Its freaking cold!!! When you talk, it's as if you're smoking. But in the day is kinda hot but not humid like Singapore. The weather here can be extreme and cruel but nonetheless I'm doing fine. There's nothing much to do here except go to the canteen to use the i-net,talk on the phone,sleep and read the book Ferra gave me.

And guess what? We are desperately in need of ciggarettes cause we werent allowed to buy duty free ciggarettes at the airport -_- . Please god, is there any way I can get someone to buy for me my supplies?? I don't know how much longer we have to stay here. I miss my family and friends back home =((

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!

Yes people, yesterday was my 21st birthday. Finally R21! Yangtze theaters here I come!!!!

Basically it feels like my birthday was everyday for this whole week thanks to Farah. Cos i've been going out with her almost every single day for this week. She's been like trying to pay for almost everything even when i insisted that i pay. She keeps giving me the same answer.."Its your birthday!" In return, I gave her a white rose to show her that i find her very sweet. She even tried to tie my shoe lace when we were playing bowling and helped me pack my stuffs into my helmet bag. Yes..I notice small little things =)

Tomorrow Im flying off to Australia for 3 weeks. So ya...gonna miss every single one of you here in Singapore!!

And also today is my Sister's birthday! Yes coincendently it fells right after mine so i dont get all the attention to myself -_- hahahaha. So ya HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAKAK!!!!

1:57AM

The things that bothers me most of the time shouldn't exist in the first place. I shouldn't think of people who shouldn't be thought of and yet my mind keeps wandering off to it. And it will always lead to creating more problems for myself. When am I going to wake up from this eternal sleep?
When am I going to stop lying to myself? When am I ready to face reality? When am I going to face the fact that I can't always get what I want?

I really miss my long hair. I really do. I miss the way it moves each time I headbang and when the wind blows against it. How i miss playing with it when Im waiting for someone or something. Without it,I feel like my self esteem and pride is gone. Thanks a million NS.


I've gotta stop creating songs about fucked up girls. Gotta create songs about the positive things. Gotta create things that inspires and motivates myself to push on harder.

Updates but I can't think of much

Glad I'm reforming back my old band with some changes to the line up. And the band name is gonna be different. It won't be Hanging By A Thread. However some awesome songs will still be kept. The rest are history. I'll be on keys now;doing what I was meant for since I was 5. However the band still needs a vocalist,a guitarist and a bassist. Anyone up to audition for us?

LAPTOP REPAIRED!!!!

Hey hey

So happy that i received my laptop yesterday! Was so excited to get home from funan. And the jam at PIE was delaying me -_-.

Anws...Life is shitty nowadays. Having torubles with money. Paying bills here n there. Plus fines -_- Haivng to work on weekends to support myself. So means weekend burned! How to fit in jamming,work,dirtbiking and girlfriend into both weekends? I wished i could stretch time =(
I dunno if i should consider again in signing on with army. At least it pays me well. And if im good for my performance, they will support my education too. Furthermore supply is soon turning into a combat vocation. So there will be cumpulosry IPPT and SOC. Its been a while since i did SOC. So look missing it and looking foward to it. Especially the "GATE". Like spiderman!! haha.

Whats your advice?